I found my HAPPINESS in JESUS

I get hurt but the difference is that now I look to my heavenly DAD and seek his face and tell him that “DAD I am hurt but it’s okay dad because I have you with me. I somehow with the help of my dad JESUS able to cast all my burdens, pains, tears and hurts to my DAD because I know he’s the wonderful man who can sort it out.

Earlier I get hurt and in pain I become restless then I start to get irritated. And the result would be nagging. At a point, I even felt like futile to express my feelings and emotions when nobody is getting convinced or able to understand. I tried and tried to solve things by talking, by clearing my mind, by ignoring but everything again futile. But then I remember that man who lived in this WORLD 2000 years ago, still living and gave his life for me on that CROSS. I said oh DAD how did I forgot you in the midst of all these issues and problem. And I realized that YES that was my problem “Forgetting my LORD”. I tried solving the problems with my skill but GOD proved no you can’t save your marriage or your kids, JOB or anything… it’s only ME and surrender to me your burdens, pains, tears, worries…  JESUS said why you have to take this pain, my daughter, when I have already taken that on the CROSS? Why you have to cry when I cried for this whole WORLD & Human race? Why you have to be in pain when I tolerated all the pain when I was whipped… why?? Come to me and call me. I realized the fact and accepted that in this world if anyone can solve things then it’s him that wonderful man who I met somewhere in my life and all my life got changed “none other than JESUS”. I declared my love… I fall in love with him and announced to myself that he’s ma MAN… everything and everybody come after that in my life, even my family and kid. Because of you the one who gave me all this.

I prayed let me seek you and look at you my LOVE JESUS. Ohhh Jesus gives me a new heart which is of yours with LOVE, COMPASSION &FORGIVENESS. Ohh, my DAD, JESUS give me your SHAME dad because I am not worthy to look at your face and call you as my DAD. Jesus my Papa give me your strength when I am on the verge of a breakdown. Ohh my LOVE JESUS give me your WISDOM to walk in the right path. DADA I just want you to take control over me. Tie me and rule me with your WORDS.

All these days I looked at this world and the things of this world. I searched happiness in this world. I tried to replace things to solve the problems. I get disappointed with my family issues. I nag my husband when he doesn’t understand my feelings. I scold my kid out of frustration. What I gained??? What did I gain other than lack of peace and pain? I didn’t gain anything when I looked into this world and the things but rather keep on feeling like I am drowning in more and more problems. I yelled and said nooo my happiness is not from my family, kid, money or this WORLD. I found my happiness in you JESUS which can’t be snatched away by this world. Bcoz you the one who loves me beyond my expectation. What is kept in this world to fantasies? Nothing I find in his world as an excitement… bcoz I can’t take a single penny or my family, job or anything when I say a GOOD-BYE to this WORLD. My life is gonna start after my death being with you. When I started to find happiness in JESUS I don’t know I had burdens, I felt bad or get hurt but he reminded me that I am with you and yours all is mine now. Your sorrows and problems are mine now. I don’t know now nothing in this world affects me.  I pray GOD my happiness should begin and end with you. I need you badly and terribly in my life back, in the same way, my heartbeats, in the same way, I need oxygen to breathe. I cried and said DAD this is the battle I am gonna fight. I can’t do it alone. I need you to be with me to win this WAR. This BATTLE is not mine but our DAD JESUS. I look at him and don’t see anything else in this WORLD. He reinstated me. I lost my way but JESUS in between called my name and said daughter you are on the wrong path… come hold my hands and this WAY… I followed him and I reached my HOME BACK. I said give me your cloth dad so that I can wear you. Let me breathe you in…

As I have read in bible “You can ask for anything in my name, and I will do it so that the Son can bring glory to the Father.” So I ask in your name that I wanna see you, I want to be happy and rejoice in you, not in this WORLD. As you said, “A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you.” So this WORLD will not influence me or touch me.

My aim is to tell and share your GOSPEL without any fear and shame. Let this world persecute me… let them take my life. let them judge me… let them call me insane… but my LOVE for you will never shake with your HELP. As PAUL said I am not ashamed of the GOSPEL. Let me proclaim… let me declare… Ohh GOD gives me the heart of boldness to speak and testify about you. Because when I am getting deeper into you I feel like going everywhere and share your WORD.  This is my AIM now… Never let me fall my GOD JESUS. Now I thank GOD that all this breakdowns, pain and tears are good to restore my LOVE towards you my LORD.